Where the heart is.

When I feel like I'm getting a little bit too caught up in the stresses of life I like to escape home, to where I grew up. With my hubby stuck at work this weekend and me feeling trapped in the claustrophobia of our house, alone with 2 kids, I decided to head north for the day.

There was a lot of relaxing, and visiting with family and friends, and soaking up the still-summer-like sun, and getting our flip-flop wearing feet covered with dust. It was exactly what I needed - exactly what we all needed.

Sun soaker...


Eating a pear straight off my parents' tree!


No collars or leashes needed. Just one-hundred acres of freedom.


I'm not the only rainbow lover...


Oh the whimsy found in my parents' home...


Dirt road walking...


Cousin love...


Sleepy ergo baby - fighting it good...


Dirty feet to end the day...


There's something magical about returning to the woods where I grew up. It's just so out there that it actually makes me forget "real" life. No internet. No cell service. No noisy streets. Just nature and family. A little piece of my heart.

Home Stretch

Well folks, September is just about over. In business terms, we're about to enter 4th quarter - the home stretch. The thing about 4th quarter is that it doesn't get the same amount of love as the other 3 quarters of the year. Once we hit 4th quarter, it becomes all about 1st quarter and the upcoming new year.

I've had a hectic week at work. We had a huge strategic planning meeting for 2013. It was all about making 2013 bigger and better than 2012. A lot of the boring business principles we talked about in that meeting got me thinking about my own life. How will I make 2013 top 2012? What steps will I take to achieve my goals?

But instead of looking that far ahead, I'm choosing to give 4th quarter 2012 the respect and attention it deserves. I plan to suck every good flavor out of the next 3 months that I can possibly get. 2012 isn't over yet, even if we are already being encouraged to look towards the next year.

Here are some happy, little moments from my life lately. I love Instagram because it allows us to take note of the simple things - the tiny moments that make up the bigger picture of our lives.

Follow along with me... I'd love to follow you, too!  {{{ @dreamstodo }}}

From left to right: Summer peaches . Snuggles with my puppy . Silly me . New purse . Sleepy babe . Fun at the children's museam . Some "me time" journal writing at Starbucks . 1st pumpkin spice latte of the season . My little mommy with her babies

1 year

“The most authentic thing about us is our capacity to create, to overcome, to endure, to transform, to love and to be greater than our suffering” ~ Ben Okri

I remember one year ago today just like it was yesterday. My belly was stretched to the max with 36 weeks of pregnancy and my heart felt like it was crumbling into a million pieces. I spent most of the day sobbing into our couch pillows after hearing the news that our dear friend Mike, my best friend's hubby, had lost his 5 month battle with cancer.

I can't believe it's been one year.

It's a crazy thing, life and death. It's insane how someone so amazing, so full of love, so inspirational, with endless amounts of potential and zeal for life can be snatched away from us so quickly. And the craziest thing about it all is that while we feel like our world has shattered around us, life doesn't stop.

The mail is still delivered.
Our favorite shows still air on TV.
The dog still needs to be fed.
The buzz of the city still exists.

I try to think of this in moments when I'm riding the back bumper of the car in front of me which is going 10 miles under the speed limit and I'm just about to lay on the horn. What if that person driving just suffered a loss? What if the speed limit is the last thing they're thinking about because their world is crashing down around them? I think it's good to seek an unselfish perspective on life whenever we feel our frustration kicking in over silly little things.

This is what Mike taught me. This is what grieving over his loss continues to remind me. It is SO not worth stressing out over little insignificant things. And watching Jessica, my BFF (love ya girl!), pick herself up and continue to ride the wave of life after losing her soul mate has been the most inspiring and encouraging thing of all. My petty little problems are NOTHING.

Life is a funny thing. We like to think we have all the answers, but we don't. No one does. All we have to go off is faith. Faith in something bigger than all this. Personally, I have faith that Mike is in a better place - a place far exceeding even our wildest dreams.

If you feel like being inspired, read the CaringBridge journal update that my BFF Jessica just posted on Mike's page. You can find it HERE.

Posy Lane

Wanna see something super cute? Well even if you don't, I'm gonna show you anyway...



That would be my oldest sporting her new footie PJs (she insisted), some fuggs (i.e. fake uggs), and her new favorite thing: a ridiculously cute personalized backpack from Posy Lane.

Have you heard of Posy Lane? If not, you should check it out. I'm pretty much obsessed with personalized things and they have the best selection of toddler backpacks, tote bags, towel wraps, nap mats, and a bazillion other items that you can get embroidered with whatever your heart desires. Love!

They sent us this owl backpack and it is seriously top-notch quality. They embroidered Leila's name on it and it is impeccable. She's been stuffing it with her baby dolls and blankies and I think there's even some stale cereal at the bottom of it. :-)







Watching her run around our backyard with this cute lil bag on her back gave me flashes of her running down the street to catch the school bus in a few years. Honestly, it made me a little bit emotional! She's so big now! Tear.

Disclaimer: The kind folks at Posy Lane sent us this awesome backpack free of charge in exchange for this review. The opinions contained within are 100% my own.

My adventures breastfeeding while working outside the home...

I have two kids and with each of them I returned to work full-time (meaning 45 hours away from them each week) when they were 12 weeks old. I was also blessed with a pair of boobs made for producing milk.

Oh wait, maybe I should start this with a disclaimer? 

If you have no interest in reading about breast milk, bottles, pumps, or sore boobs, feel free to leave and return another day. I swear this will be my last time talking about boob juice until my next kiddo comes along (who's not even a twinkle in our eyes as of today). For those of you who can relate to me, or want some advice, or maybe just really like reading about breastfeeding, please stick around.

Landon Drew. The morning he decided to break up with my boobs.


I always knew I wanted to breastfeed my children. I also knew I probably wasn't going to be one of those parents who breastfed their kid through age three. I would have loved to make it until each of my kiddos turned one, but that didn't happen. However, given the circumstances I am extremely proud of myself for trucking it out as long as I did. Here is my story with Leila and Landon...

Leila was my first child. I was a paranoid mess when she came along. I breastfed her every two hours on the dot those first few weeks - stressing out when she wouldn't latch on, thinking she was going to starve to death if she missed a feeding. And it didn't help that my supply was INSANE. I mean, seriously. I could pump 6 ounces in under 5 minutes. By the time the end of my maternity leave was approaching I was a mess over how I would handle my engorged boobs in the office and making sure that she didn't have to have any formula for as long as possible.

Long story short, here's the gist of how I kept up breastfeeding while Leila was an infant in daycare...

• When she would wake up in the morning I would breastfeed her on one side while pumping the other.  I figured out how to rig the pump cone up to my nursing bra with a ponytail elastic so that I could go hands free - pretty sweet! That session would provide a whole bottle of breast milk for me to send to daycare with her. (She slept through the night very early, so I was always super FULL in the mornings.)
• At work, I would take two pump breaks - one around 10am and one around 3pm. Even though I have my own office, it was always a little awkward because everyone knew what I was doing when I closed the door. I would pump for around 10-15 minutes and each session would provide me with 2-3 bottles worth of milk for the following day.
• Over my lunch break around noon, I would go visit Leila and feed her straight from the boob. I am very blessed to work just 5 minutes from my kiddos' daycare. This provided me with more bonding time with her each day and I think it really helped keep my supply up.
• Every night after I put Leila down for bed, I would take the milk I pumped that day and put it into bags to send to daycare the next morning. I had a note taped on the door leading into our garage that reminded me to grab the milk and my pump so that I wouldn't forget it each morning. :-)

Leila was exclusively breastfed until she was 6 months old. At 6 months, I was exhausted. I couldn't bare the thought of pumping anymore at work. So we introduced formula, but I continued to breastfeed her on my lunches and in the mornings and evenings. Pretty soon she was too busy and distracted to breastfeed at lunch so we dropped that feeding. Then, she didn't want to do it at night. I hung on to the morning feeding until she was around 9 months old. She decided on her own that she'd just rather hold a bottle and do her own thing. I was sick of fighting with her. 

Everything with Landon has been different. For one thing, he's my second baby and I've been WAY more relaxed than I ever was with Leila. I decided from the get-go that I wouldn't stress out about exclusively breastfeeding him when I returned to work. In all honesty, I just couldn't bare the thought of pumping at work again. I hate pumping! (But really, who likes it?) We introduced formula to Landon when he was around 10 weeks old and he took to it right away. I slowly took away breastfeeding sessions and "trained" my boobs to produce milk only in the mornings and at night over the course of a few weeks. For the first couple of months after I returned to work, I would come home at lunch and pump so he could have at least one bottle of breast milk at daycare each day. I didn't go visit him like I did with Leila because, in all honesty again, something about it was just hard for me. And I didn't want to risk Leila seeing me and having to deal with her emotions when I left again.

When Landon was around 5 months old, I stopped pumping at all and he only got breast milk straight off the tap first thing in the morning and throughout the night (remember, he JUST started sleeping through the night).  At 10 months he decided he would much rather hold a bottle and be able to "do his own thang" than have me smothering him, so we dropped the night time feeding. At almost 11 months (just last week), I couldn't fight him any more on our morning session, so I gave up and got him a bottle. My boobs are pretty much deflated bean bags now. TMI?

The moral of this super long, and probably totally-boring-for-you story is that when it comes to breastfeeding your baby, there is no right or wrong way to do it... you just have to do what works for you! Yes, breastfeeding is GREAT for baby, but it is some seriously exhausting business when you're the momma. Add pumping into the mix and it can become a full time job on it's own. I have experienced two different breastfeeding journeys and I came to the conclusion that I have been so much happier with my experience with Landon. I haven't been as hard on myself. Yes, he's had formula since he was 10 weeks old, but he's also super happy and healthy! It didn't kill him! And it helped take some stress off me. At least he got the added benefits of SOME breast milk for as long as he did.

FYI... I left out TONS of details (hard to believe with the length of this, right?) on things like how I battled painful engorgment & borderline mastitus, so if any of you have ANY questions about pumping or breastfeeding or boob "training" please please PLEASE don't hesitate to contact me. I'd love to share more of my experience and help you in your BFing journey. :-)

11 Months

Every month I say how I can't believe how fast the time is flying and I can't believe how big and how old Landon is already. Well, I'm going to say it again. He's friggin' 11 months old!!! That means that next month I won't be saying he's 12 months old because he'll be ONE! $#%*^#@^&!!!!!!

And look at how cute he is!







All about Landon Drew at, sniff sniff, 11 months old...

• Guess what? Big news! Landon is officially sleeping through the night! Dead serious! 7:30pm to around 6:30am without a peep! Okay, maybe sometimes he cries out in his sleep once or twice, but he doesn't wake up. I had forgotten how amazing a full night of sleep is. :-)
• He's still rockin' the gummy look - no teeth yet for this guy! Ha!
• Landon figured out how to crawl up stairs the other week. We didn't even realize it until we were in the kitchen and the next thing we knew, he was gone. Where did we find him? At the top of the stairs.
• His favorite things? Tastes of sissy's chocolate milk, putting things in cups, bath time, banging toys against our living room window, chasing Billy, rolling around on our bed, peek-a-boo.
• Bye, bye breast milk. Landon weaned himself last week. I'm glad that it was his choice, but I'm sad that it's over. Mixed emotions here.
• He's still battling some pretty nasty eczema. I hate having to use the steroid cream on him, so we just try to keep him really moisturized. It's so sad when he's just itching away at himself.
• I've said it before and I'll say it again, Landon is just the best baby! He's still just so good at going with the flow. He'll eat pretty much anything. He goes down to sleep like a champ. And now that he's sleeping through the night, I can say that he's pretty much perfection! Knocking on wood.

I love you baby boy! Even when you're one, and even when you're 41, you'll always be my baby!

Favorite Baby Things

Wanna know something ca-razy? My baby is going to be ONE exactly one month from tomorrow!!! I seriously can't even believe it. Any minute he's going to be walking and talking and before I know it he'll be begging for us to buy him a car and send him to Europe for summer vacation...

In honor of the end of Landon's babyhood (okay, not really, but it kinda feels like it) I decided to compile a little list of my favorite baby products. These are things that I would highly recommend to any new parent. Makes me wanna have another baby!



1.  Ergo Baby Carrier - With Leila, all I had was a Baby Bjorn. With Landon I splurged on the Ergo and OMG, what a difference! Worth every single penny! This is the reason I survived so long without a double stroller. And he still loves to be carried in it. Probably my favorite baby thing of all.

2.  Cloud b Sleep Sheep (travel size) - This is a little plush sheep that plays white noise like rain falling and ocean waves. I had the full size version with Leila and we finally burnt it out so I bought the travel size one for Landon. FYI... the travel size has the exact same noise machine in it, but it's smaller and cheaper! We LOVE LOVE LOVE this thing. We used it from day 1 with both babies at nap times and when putting them down at night. There is a 20 minute and 45 minute setting. I swear this thing works like a charm in getting them to fall asleep - still to this day!

3.  Aden & Anais Swaddling Blankets - I can't say enough good things about these. They are the lightest, softest, cutest swaddling blankees and they are much larger than most swaddlers, so super easy to use. This is a go-to baby shower gift for me. Every new parent needs to own some of these for their little one. And like a good wine, they get better with age!

4.  Tommee Tippee Bottles - I used Avent bottles for Leila and we hated them. They leaked all the time. With Landon, we gave these ones a try and we LOVE them! If you are doing a breastfeeding/bottle feeding combo for your baby, these are the best. They are shaped the most like a boob. And I love the simplicity of the design - no little parts to clean and put together... just a bottle and a nipple and ring. And they come in some cute colors/designs! Always a plus. :-)

5.  Phil & Teds Explorer Stroller - We just got this stroller and I don't know how I survived so long without it! We own a basic Graco travel system stroller, a no-name umbrella stroller, and a single Jeep jogging stroller... this one blows all of those out of the water by a mile! It is the smoothest ride, super easy to fold/unfold, and the most compact double jogging stroller I've ever seen. Awesome sauce.

6.  Skip Hop Versa Diaper Bag - Love this diaper bag. It is the perfect size - bigger than a lot of the diaper bags out there, so great for cloth diaper mommas. It has two insulated bottle pockets, which in my book are a must-have in a diaper bag. I love the way it's organized and it's stylish, too.

7.  DSLR Camera - Okay, so I know that this isn't technically a baby item, but I would consider this a must-have investment for all parents. We didn't buy our Canon Rebel until Leila was older and the quality of her baby photos are crap! It is so hard to capture great pics of infants and toddlers with a standard digital camera. You really need the fast shutter speed! And besides, having a nice (and expensive) camera motivates you to take more pics of your little ones. This is an investment worth every penny in my book.

8.  Baby Delight Snuggle Nest - I wouldn't consider this a "must-have" baby item, but we love this thing! It is a little wedged co-sleeper bed for infants, but we never used it for co-sleeping. We would put this is the large pack n play or crib from day one when baby was home... it holds them in place at an angle (great for reflex) and I think it helps them sleep better because they feel like they are in a smaller, safe place instead of a big, wide-open crib. Also, when traveling we would just bring this thing (folds up and fits in a suitcase) and have baby sleep in it on the floor. And no matter where we were, they had their bed that they were always used to sleeping in. :-) Also, it has a light and music/white noise on it - great for midnight diaper changes!

9.  A Soft Lovey - My kiddos love their loveys - little square blanket things with animal heads attached to them. Leila has a purple bear one from Target and we got Landon one similar to the one above from this Etsy store. It is the cutest thing EVER! And such great quality! He's still a little young to be attached to it, but we give it to him every night when he goes to sleep and he rubs it on his face. I'm hoping it will become his security item the way that Leila's bear blankee is hers.

10.  BumGenius 4.0 Cloth Diapers -  So I've only tried a few different types of cloth diapers, but these BumGenius ones are my favorite. They are spendy, but the quality shows. Over time, other diapers will get pilly or start looking "used" but these ones hold their value! It's nice to have a variety of different types of CDs, but I would recommend trying one or two of these guys.

This was FUN! I just love all things baby. :-)

Is your passion profitable?

Okay, so I stumbled upon a website/blog that speaks directly to me and my mission to find my passion and make some life changes. I haven't spent much time exploring it yet, but I just had to share this AWESOME graphic with you...



I found this on Paid To Exist. In their words, "Paid to Exist is about eliminating the separation between what you get paid to do and what you love so that you can contribute to your world and live a life of freedom." I LOVE IT!

You should also check out this post from their blog: How Do I Find My Passion? The Missing “Recovery” Method

A little hump day inspiration for us all. :-)

Hey, if ya wanna pin the image above, please do so from the original source HERE. Thanks!

Stuffed Peppers Recipe

One of my favorite comfort foods of all time! And it's actually pretty healthy...

STUFFED PEPPERS!


Actually, I think I'll call the version we made: Stuffed Half Peppers with Brown Rice & Spinach. Boy oh boy are they tasty. And oh so easy.

Ingredients (recipe can easily be halved):

• 6 bell peppers - we like red because they're sweeter, but any color works
• 1 lb. ground beef or turkey or whatev your heart desires
• 1 cup brown rice
• 1/2 a large onion
• 1 large stalk of celery
• A couple handfuls of baby spinach
• 1 jar of your favorite spaghetti sauce
• Some shredded cheese of your choice - we used an italian blend in the bag
• Option (but oh so recommended): a dash of red wine

Some of my ingredients posing for a picture. Wasn't a huge fan of this spaghetti sauce, though...


Here's what ya do...

1. Get your rice cooking and preheat your oven to 350 degrees.



2. Have your hubby cut up the veggies. :-) Cut the bell peppers in half the long way and clean out all of the seeds and white bits. Unlike most stuffed pepper recipes that use the whole pepper at once, we cut them in half. You get a lot more bang for your buck this way and I find that eating a half is plenty. Chop the onions and celery up, too.



Go hubby, go!


3. Take a break to admire your cute baby who's busy playing with your toes. Oh wait, maybe this is just me.



4. Brown and drain the ground beef (or turkey) and then add in your chopped veggies and saute it all together. Feel free to add some garlic or Italian seasoning, maybe some S&P... whatever you fancy!



5. While your kitchen fills with the smell of deliciousness, pour a little bit of your jar of spag sauce into the bottom of a glass baking dish and spread it around before laying your pepper halves down in it. We used a little dish since we cooked up a half batch this time.



Oh Andy, you missed a few seeds.


5. Pour the rest of the jar of sauce in with your meat/veggies and mix it all together. When your rice is done, add that in too. Oh, and add some handfuls of baby spinach as well. You can't mess this up people!



Someone just loves to help in the kitchen!


6. Okay, now it's time to put the "Stuffed" into Stuffed Peppers! Take a spoon and scoop the good stuff into your peppers - nice, big mounds! That is, after you pour some of the red wine you're drinking into the stuffing. We live by the sign that hangs above our kitchen sink...





7. Cover your peppers with tin foil and bake at 350 for 30 minutes. After that, remove the tin foil and top your peppers with as much shredded cheese as you desire. Stick them back in the oven uncovered for another 10-15 minutes. Your peppers will still have a little bite to them - we don't like mushy peppers around here.



Serve with garlic bread! No need for a salad - I say there's enough veggies in there!


Nom, Nom, Nom...

My Own Worst Enemy

I'm such a contradiction. Multiple personalities. Opinions that change on a daily basis. Indecisive about everything. For instance, I'm actually pretty anti-social and prefer the comfort of my home over social events, which sometimes give me anxiety. However, if I'm alone for too long I get antsy and even start feeling like I'm going crazy a little. I'm an odd one.



This past weekend was a working weekend for my hubby, so I was home with the kiddos. Throughout the summer we stayed very busy every weekend he had to work - there was just always something going on. But on this weekend, we had nothing planned. I found myself alone with my thoughts a lot, which can be a scary thing. I came to the conclusion that it isn't being alone with the kids that I have a problem with, it's being alone with myself.

Does that make any sense?

I think I'm just too hard on myself. I don't give myself enough credit for all that I do. Most of us don't. We compare ourselves to all the pretty people that we see on TV and online and we don't think we're doing enough. But, we are. I am.

So, mid laundry folding and kitchen cleaning while the kiddos napped, I stopped. I went outside and enjoyed the last tastes of summer we're probably going to get. And I took a few deep breaths and I yelled at myself (in my head) for being too hard on myself and for thinking too dang much.



Don't you wish we had a stop button for our brains? Oh man, I would use that thing all the time. :-)

End online therapy session with myself.

Fair Fun

Last night after I got off work, Andy & I packed up the kiddos in the car and headed off to the county fair for some family time, fair-food and fun.

Leila loved the car ride - she went on it twice...




She also loved the carousel which I had the pleasure of accompanying her on (daddy did last year)...




Whoa, I can totally see how we look alike in this pic!


My dinner of choice... hand-dipped corn dog! Classy, I know.


But, I was tempted to try this... NOT!


Lando enjoyed the fair food, too...


There's something magical about it all...


And we ended the night with some cotton candy and an amazing sunset...




Okay, I think I got my fair fix for the year. And my belly is telling me to go easy on the greasy food next time. :-)