Skinny Fat

I seriously can't even fathom the number of times people have commented on my weight. You're so skinny! What are you, like a size 0? Jeez girl, you need to get some meat on those bones! So, do you work out a lot? Oh my gosh, you're so tiny!  

For my whole life I've been thin. Knobby knees, no butt, wrists too small for any watch. Crazy as it may seem to someone who struggles with losing weight, I actually grew up being very self conscious of my skinniness. And now that I've popped out a couple of babies and I'm getting a little bit older, I'm self conscious of it in a new way. I'm no longer just skinny. I'm skinny fat. And this is NOT a good thing.

In case you've never heard the term "skinny fat," let's see how Urban Dictionary defines it:



My friend Katie introduced me to this concept and it fits my problem to a T. I'm still small and I appear thin and maybe even fit from a distance. However, my muscle/body fat ratio is WAY outta whack. I've got no muscle tone or definition whatsoever (okay, except for my left arm which is buff from lugging around a 20+ lb. baby everywhere). And yes, I've got cottage cheese on my bum. It ain't pretty people.

Basically, I need to come clean with all of you. While I was kicking butt for a while, dedicating some time every evening to BodyRock, I'm now doing nothing. Occasionally I chase Leila around the house (completely winded, mind you), but other than that, there is no fitness in my life right now. I go to work all day where I sit in front of a computer - my ass actually gets sore from sitting so long. And then I go home and I do spend some time on my feet taking care of the kids, but once they're asleep it's back down I go - either in front of the computer or the TV.

Why am I blogging about this? Well, lately I haven't felt quite right. Something is off. My happy-meter is low. I think it has to do with the fact that I'm not healthy. I eat like crap and I don't exercise. Sure I look ok, and maybe even fit to most people, but I'm not. I'm skinny fat and I need to do something about it. If not for my body, for my mind.

Now I just need to figure out a way to squeeze some fitness time back into my life. I'll probably go back to BodyRock or maybe even just working on fitting 15 minutes of solid exercise in every evening. Time to tone and tighten, people. Time to get back to some dream doing. But more importantly, time to get my head on straight again.

Any suggestions? ideas? motivation? words of wisdom for someone who HATES working out?

Monthly DIY: Photoshop Silhouette

For the past few months I've been seeing silhouette art popping up all over Etsy & Pinterest. Soooooooo, I decided it was about time for me to try my hand and making some silhouettes of my kiddos for their bedroom wall. I just LOVE how they turned out!


You're jealous of our wood paneled walls, aren't you? ;-)

From this...


To this...


Aren't they so cute?

Okay, now here's a little disclaimer before I describe how I made these. I AM NOT A PHOTOSHOP PRO. Actually, I just played around with tools that I already know how to use until I found the quickest, easiest way for me to make these. This is not going to be an extremely detailed tutorial. If you don't already have basic knowledge of Photoshop, I may not be much help. End disclaimer.

Here's what I did to create these silhouette portraits of my cute kiddos...

1)  I took profile photos of them against a white wall. The cleaner and brighter the background, the better. (Landon's cracks me up - his tongue is out! Ha!)

2)  I opened the photos in Photoshop and used the magic eraser tool to remove the white background in one quick click:

Use magic eraser to delete white background...


3) I created a new layer and used the paint bucket tool to make it a bright color that would contrast against the kiddos (I chose bright blue). I moved this layer to the back:

Put bright colored fill layer behind photo layer so that it stands out...


4) Next, I made sure the photo layer was selected and then went to IMAGE > ADJUSTMENTS > BRIGHTNESS/CONTRAST. Once the Brightness/Contrast window opened, I moved both levels down as low as they could go (-100):

Lower brightness/contrast to make your silhouette...


5) Okay, now do ya see all that black fuzz in that last pic - the places that the magic eraser tool missed? Well, you could go around and erase all that yourself, but here's what I did. I used the magic wand tool and clicked on my kiddos head. This selects only the silhouette portion (not the fuzz). Then, I right clicked and selected LAYER VIA COPY. This moves the selection to a brand new layer. Then, you can delete your original photo layer and you have a pretty clean silhouette that just needs a little touching up:

Use magic wand tool to create a new layer of just the silhouette...


Delete the original photo layer and you are left with a cleaner silhouette...


6)  At this point all that needs to be done is some cleaning up and optional tweaks. I used a combination of the eraser tool and the paint brush tool to clean up the edges of my silhouettes and then deleted all of the mess below their necks. Then, I decided to play with the colors a little by adding a reddish/orange color overlay to the silhouettes, along with an outer glow, and a funky pattern to the background. The options are endless!

Ta Da!


So maybe this seems like a lot of work or that it took me a long time, but seriously it's taking me longer to type up this post. Ha! If you are at all familiar with Photoshop it is super easy. And if you don't have access to Photoshop, but still wanna try making one of these, check out this tutorial on how to make silhouettes in GIMP (you can download GIMP for free HERE).

The final product hanging on the wall in my kiddos' room...

Look at my chubba wubba! Eeeeeek! I just wanna eat him up.

Linking this post up with: CraftOManiac, Skip To My Lou, The Gunny Sack, Lines Across, & DIY Project Parade. Check 'em out!

Friday's Letters

Dear Huckleberry Cobbler: Get in my belly!

Dear Hubby: Thank you for baking me huckleberry cobbler. I can't stop thinking about it. Oh, and I love you so much.

Dear Body: I'm sorry I've neglected you. The lack of exercise lately + huckleberry cobbler hasn't been too good to you. For that I apologize.

Dear Leila: Thank you for being my little ray of sunshine on my bad attitude. You are SO good at turning mommy's frown upside down.

Dear Landon: So, just when I think I can't love you any more you go and sleep through the night - you're the best! Thank you so much for that. Mommy needed it. XOXO.

Dear Bachelor Franchise: My obsession with you just isn't right. I'm sad that The Bachelorette is over and now all I want to do is watch Bachelor Pad. Frankly, I'm a little embarrassed. Thanks for giving me something to look forward to on a drab Monday.

Dear Friday: Bout dang time you showed up! Did ya know you're my favorite day of the week?

Dear Blogher: Maybe next year?

Dear Friends (yes, YOU!): Thank you for reading this nonsense. I heart you! Have a fab weekend! (& please tell me I'm not the only Bachelor Pad fan out there!)

Wise Words Wednesday: Wonder

"If we experienced life through the eyes of a child, everything would be magical and extraordinary. Let our curiosity, adventure and wonder of life never end…" ~ Akiane Kramarik

Watching my kiddos enjoy the summertime brings me back to memories of my own childhood, when I had not a care in the world. Days spent at the lake splashing in cool water. Popsicles dripping down my chin and onto my clothes without a care. Listening to the chirping of crickets outside my bedroom window as I fell asleep at night. Man oh man, those really were the good ole days.

Now, instead of as many carefree days, I get to spend the bulk of my time closed up in an office at work or trying to maintain my sanity with chores at home. Despite this sad fact, I can easily say that I'm enjoying the summer just as much as I did when I was a kid, just in a different way. I'm experiencing it through my little ones - living vicariously through them. And seeing them experience things like putting their feet in the sand for the first time, napping under an umbrella on the beach, or sliding down a slip 'n slide with their cousins, is about 500 times sweeter than experiencing it myself.

I hope I never forget to seize the wonder.

Just Write {Skinny Dipping}

The little bar in the center of my tiny hometown was hot and crowded. Loud music and laughter filled the air as our 10 year high school reunion was in full swing. Being away from my kiddos and surrounded by all of my high school friends, some of whom I hadn't seen in a decade, made me feel young again. Around midnight, as we were dancing the night away and I could feel my new shirt sticking to my body, damp with sweat, someone (maybe it was me?) suggested we go for a swim at the nearby private lake. I flashed back to memories of midnight skinny dipping as I was growing up and I thought, why not?

Four of my best girlfriends and I hopped in a car giggling like high schoolers as we headed for the lake. In that moment we were totally young again, carefree and kidless. We blasted the heat in the car so that the water would feel extra refreshing once we arrived and drove right on up to the sandy shore of the lake. As we approached I could see steam rising off the warm, black water. Swiftly we ripped off our sweaty clothes and ran from the car to the end of the dock, not even hesitating to jump right on in.

I felt the cool lake water swallow me up and for a few seconds there was silence. Once my head surfaced all I could hear were squeels of laughter as water splashed around me. I can't believe we're doing this! Above us was a black, moonless sky full of a million twinkling stars. Ahead of us, the water was completely calm and undisturbed - a glossy, black satin surface reflecting the stars above.

We swam from the shore dock out to the floating dock in the middle of the lake, trying our best to muffle our giggles and keep quiet so no one would hear us. Once there, we each scrambled up the latter and dove off the diving board, plunging our bare bodies once again into the dark, smooth water. The top layer of the lake water was warm from the day's hot sun, but as we passed through it we reached the deep, icy level and quickly swam back up to the surface.

Returning to the shore, I felt so happy. Happy to be doing something spontaneous and free. Something with "my girls." And later on, in the early morning hours as I climbed in to bed with my husband and daughter, I just felt blessed. Blessed that I can still enjoy the best of both worlds - immature fun with friends and an amazing family to return home to. (And of course blessed that we didn't get caught skinny dipping!)

I think sometimes we just need a little trip back to our adolescence to make us feel young again, and to remind us that we don't always need to take life so seriously.

9 Months

This means my little guy is going to turn ONE in just 3 short months! This is insanity people!

So, I am quite disappointed with this month's photos. Landon did NOT cooperate during the photoshoot and I'm not a good enough photographer to handle it. He is just too dang busy to be bothered with holding still for a simple photo these days! The next few monthly photoshoots should be interesting.

The change from 8 month Landon to 9 month Landon has been insane! He has totally moved on from the infant stage in the last month...

• He finally started crawling, but it isn't a normal crawl. He uses his left knee, but his right foot. It's quite humorous to watch actually.
• Weighing in around 23 lbs means that he has a lot of weight to work with, so he just (literally, Thursday night) started pulling up to stand on things. I'm so proud of him.
• After battling constipation since the introduction of solid foods around 5-6 months, I'm happy to report that we are finally starting to see some regularity in Landon's bowl movements. It's the little things in life. :-)
• Shocker: Landon LOVES food. He will eat pretty much anything that we eat now. Just chop it up and he goes to town on it. He actually eats more than his sister sometimes. I don't think I've found anything he won't eat.
• Sleeping is still rough around here. Landon takes 2 solid naps/day and goes down for the night easily around 7:30pm. However, he still wakes up 1-3 times/night wanting to be rocked or fed. After our vacation in August, we plan on implementing some sleep training. We'll see.
• My poor little man is still battling some nasty eczema. I'm hoping he will eventually grow out of it. In the mean time, we just keep him lotioned up as much as possible.
• Landon is still just the happiest little (big) guy. He lights up the room with his infectious smile.
• He's turning into a red head! I don't know if it's the sun or just new hair growth, but his hair definitely has a red tint to it now.
• T-R-O-U-B-L-E. That's what I'm seeing little glimpses of in Landon Drew. Now that he's mobile, he's going straight for the cords and power outlets and his favorite thing, Billy's food and water dishes. I try to tell him NO in a stern voice, but that just makes him laugh. I'm going to have my hands full with this one.
• My momma's boy. It's true what they say... boys love their mommas. He loves to snuggle with me - he nuzzles right into my neck - and he always wants me to hold him. Leila was never this attached to me. I'm soaking it all in because I know it won't last forever.

Helmet Update: Unfortunately, not much to report here. Landon is still wearing his helmet. As of our last check up, Landon's head hadn't grown in over a month! So, it's just a waiting game for him to have one last growth spurt. To us, his head looks phenomenal! We are still 100% happy with our decision to go with the helmet therapy.

A Day of Unplugging: July 2012

Oops, I did it again! (he, he, he.) Last Sunday, I unplugged for the day. No TV, no computer, no iPad, no phone (well, mostly) for a full 24 hours. I actually found this time around to be a little bit tougher than the first time I unplugged because I was home alone with the kids all day (hubby had to work) with nothing exciting planned. I did however savor those everyday moments just a little bit more than I would have normally with my phone attached to my body. Once again, it felt really good.

Random moments from my July day of unplugging...

Leila Jade got a nasty bug bite on her eye lid, so her right eye was swollen for most of the day. Fun times.

My child still loves the squeezie baby food things - one of the only ways to get her to eat veggies. Hey, I'll take it. (Poor little swollen eye...)


Free moments throughout the day were spent reading an actual book (since the iPad was off limits). I read all of "Heaven is For Real" and I highly recommend it. Super fast read, cute, and enlightening.



Best part of the day? Leila, Landon, and I were all in Leila's bed reading a book before nap time and we ALL fell asleep together! I woke up after a few minutes and moved Landon into his crib and then I went and crashed in my bed where I took an hour long nap! I woke up to Leila jumping on me, telling me that Landon was awake in his crib. After nap time we headed outside to play.





For dinner I had planned to make my spaghetti squash recipe, but I wasn't 100% sure how the heck you cook a spaghetti squash. I immediately went to grab my phone to do a little googling, but stopped myself. Instead, I grabbed a good ole cookbook off the shelf and looked it up. Ha! Haven't used that thing for a while!



Big boy taking down some green beans for dinner...


After dinner I enjoyed a tea party with my kiddos in the bathroom. Leila makes a wicked cup of strawberry tea...



Poor Landon got tea dumped on his head...


It was a simple day, but special. I totally absorbed every moment with my kiddos - even nap time!

But, I'm not gonna lie... I did use my phone a couple of times. First, when Andy called me from work I had to answer, just in case. Second, when my bad ass friend, Sheena, texted me to say that she completed her marathon in record time. How could I not text her back? Otherwise, I was completely unplugged for a full 24 hours.

Linking up this post today with Emily over at Peck Life as part of her "Let's Unplug!" series. Join in on the fun - it's good for your brain, people.

Wise Words Wednesday: Reunion Time

"There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered." ~ Nelson Mandela

It's been 10 years since I graduated from high school. This weekend I will reunite with people I haven't seen since then and spend time with some of my best friends still to this day. My 10 year reunion - WOW.

Right now I actually feel a little bit emotional about the whole thing. I think growing up in a super small town makes the class relationship as a whole that much stronger. We all knew each other and a good chunk of us are still close friends. I have some great memories from high school. I guess you could say I hung out in the popular crowd. I didn't have an athletic bone in my body (and still don't), but pretty much all of my friends were athletes. Hubby (who graduated in the class behind me) was a star football, basketball, and baseball player. I remember the moment he played in the 2001 state basketball championship and WON like it was yesterday. I, on the other hand, was a straight A student with no extracurricular activities who loved art classes and who didn't know what the heck I wanted to be when I grew up (and obviously I still haven't quite figured that one out).

I remember thinking about the future at my high school graduation - wondering where we would all be in 10 years. How different we would all be. I really was clueless where I would end up and only had a few set-in-stone goals: marriage, kids, own a home. Check, check, check. I guess I feel successful in that respect.

I'm excited to see everyone this weekend - to see where the crazy road of life has taken each of them. And I can't wait to laugh, and maybe even cry, reminiscing the good ole days in our small country town.

I heart spaghetti squash.

I was at the grocery store yesterday morning when I noticed a lovely pile of various types of squash calling my name. They were saying, "Hey Ariel, I know it's like 90 degrees out, but we think you should take us home and cook us anyway!"  I stood there for a minute and decided, what the heck, I'm gonna bake me a squash!  So, I bought three beautiful squash: 1 butternut, 1 acorn, and 1 spaghetti squash.

I've never cooked a spaghetti squash before, but one of my friends posted about how amazing it is on Facebook the other day and I instantly had flashbacks of eating spaghetti squash with butter, salt, and pepper on a cool Fall evening with my family. My momma used to make it all the time. So, I was craving it and decided to take a stab at coming up with a new dish for my family.

I present to you my spaghetti squash vegetable medley. Seriously, this was love at first bite. Even little Landon Drew chowed down on this!



What I used (but think of the possibilities!):

• 1 spaghetti squash
• 1 zucchini
• 1/2 onion
• 1/2 red bell pepper
• Handful of sliced mushrooms
• 2 cloves of diced garlic
• 1/2 cup low-sodium chicken broth
• 1/2 cup dry white wine (optional, but oh so tasty)
• Dash of Italian seasoning
• Salt & Pepper to taste
• Sprinkling of shredded parmesan cheese

How to bake the spaghetti squash (I'm sure you can also just microwave it, but that kinda creeps me out for some reason):

• Chop that bad boy in half (tougher than it sounds) and scrape out all of the seeds and gooey insides (like a pumpkin).
• Put face down in 1/2 inch of water in a glass baking pan.
• Bake at 350 for 45-60 minutes or until tender when poked with a fork.
• Once done, let it cool for a few minutes then shred all of the spaghetti squash goodness out with a fork.

Now, we could just smother this with butter and S&P and eat as is, but I stepped it up a notch with the following:

• Saute chopped veggies and garlic in a little bit of olive oil until tender.
• Poor in chicken broth, white wine, Italian seasoning, and some S&P.
• Let this all simmer together for a couple of minutes and then toss in your shredded spaghetti squash.
• Poor that goodness out on a plate and top with shredded parmesan cheese.
• Eat with a side of chewy garlic bread.

This makes for one super filling and healthy meal that tastes divine! Serious!

Now I'm off to go eat the leftovers! YUMMO!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

PS - I totally slept off my attitude from Saturday and I'm back to my old self! I just hate hate random bad days. Those of you who commented totally lifted my spirits, too! Thanks!

When You Can't Find The Good

To put it simply, today sucked... big time. I won't go into the details because it's stupid. It was just one of those days that seemed to drag on and on and all I wanted it to do was come to an end. I am really working on being a more positive and optimistic person. And I'm pretty dang smart, so when I feel like I'm suffering I can logically think about how irrational I am - that there are people all across our planet suffering WAY more than I could even imagine. Usually this will snap me out of my funk. This along with a good prayer.

But some times you just have a day where no matter how hard you try, you just can't find the good. The only solution is to wallow in self-pity for a while and then sleep it off. Well that's all that works for me usually. Oh, and a nice bubble bath and a glass of wine doesn't hurt either.

Okay, enough Negative Nancy venting for me. In one final attempt to cheer myself up and put today behind me, I leave you with one of my favorite Instagram pics I've taken to date...

I love my fur baby, Billy. Oh, and will some more of you please follow me on Instagram (@dreamstodo)? Please and thank you. I feel like a total loser with under 30 people interested in seeing my life in pics. Ha!

I hope your weekend is going better than mine! :-)

FYI! Tomorrow I will be unplugging once again for the day and linking up my experience next Friday with Emily @ Peck Life. You should totally give it a try and join in on the fun - it really is liberating!

On having another baby...

First off, no I am not pregnant. Sorry if I got you excited for a split second. I've just been thinking about babies a lot lately. I know, I know - I have a baby so why the heck am I thinking about having more babies? Well, it seems like at least once/week someone asks me how Landon is doing and this leads to the question of when we are going to have another one. People are so straight forward, aren't they? And this means that I am left pondering that question a lot. I mean, do I even want another child?



Then I see a beastly, crawling little boy down at my feet and I wonder, where did my baby go? Where is the quiet, snugly little thing that used to fit in a wicker basket? And even though he's still technically very much a baby, a small (& crazy) part of me wants a newborn again. The fact that my days of swaddling, and 0-3 month clothing, and newborn-baby smell could be over if I don't have another child makes me very sad. I don't think I savored Landon's newborn-ness enough.

But then I think about the flip side - the waking up every 2 hours, the poopy diapers, the potty training, the tantrums. Do I really want to start over with all of that again?

And then out of no where Leila randomly asks for a baby sister. I knew it was going to happen eventually, I just didn't think it would be this soon. I questioned her back to make sure I understood correctly...

"You want mommy to carry another baby in my belly so that you can be a big sister again?"
Leila replied, "Yeah! A baby girl!"
I smiled and said, "Okay."



How does one choose whether or not to have another child? I guess some people grow up knowing exactly what they want out of life, including their family size. Others choose based on finances. In all honesty, if I won the lottery I'd have 10 babies just because I could afford to have someone help me when needed and I wouldn't have to work.

In my case, I think it comes down to a gut feeling. The idea of having more children actually frightens me. I feel like I'm losing my sanity at times as it is and the thought of raising teenagers scares the crap out of me. BUT, deep down I just know that our family isn't complete yet. Something, someone, is missing.

In the end I guess it's up to God.

Wise Words Wednesday: Firsts

"The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

The other night we took Leila out for her first bike ride. The excitement on her face was priceless and I think Andy & I were equally as excited. And ya know what? This experience made me realize something. The other day I posted about how I am waiting for my 2012 "big moment" to happen - something that will define this year and make it memorable. Well, as I watched my husband help my daughter steer her bike and teach her to peddle for the very first time I realized that this was a big moment. We were all experiencing this together for the very first time. It was Leila's first time riding a bike and our first time teaching someone to ride a bike (and Landon's first time watching someone ride a bike).

Life is full of firsts. Sometimes we are so caught up in looking ahead or stressing about nonsense that we overlook these special, little, new moments.





So, at least for today I am SO over stressing out about the future, about my dreams, about my goals. I just want to soak up the little moments with my family and savor all of the firsts that life has to offer.

Hot Mess + Birthday Madness

Well my friends, a heat wave has struck our region bringing along with it lots of crazy happenings in my life. Between the 100 degree weather, lack of sleep due to a sick baby and 3-year old birthday planning, I have turned into one big hot mess. I don't even know how I'm pulling it together to put up this post right now. All I want to do is be trapped on a secluded island with a frothy pina colada and an air mattress. This momma needs a little R&R.

With a stressful (and non-relaxing) 4th of July week behind me, I'm moving into this week feeling optimistic. Summer is here, my family is healthy, I have a very happy 3-year old daughter now and a baby who is finally crawling. Life is good, despite the craziness it sometimes entails.

Leila's 3rd birthday was quite the success! She had the BEST. DAY. EVER. I made sure her birthday would be a day to remember by pretty much catering to her every whim. She wanted a cupcake for breakfast? Done. She wanted a balloon at the grocery store? Done. It was those little actions that made her feel extra special. And the night before, we decorated the house with streamers and balloons so that the birthday excitement started right upon wake up. This will definitely become a birthday tradition in our house - the look on her face was priceless!

As for her party, we didn't go over the top and I'm so happy we made that decision! The 103 degree temp made our non-AC house a sauna and a big crowd would have made it even more miserable. We just had family over for a luau party and it was quite the success. The rest in pics...

My 3 year old...


Leila woke up to find her very first bike...


Cupcakes!




Birthday Princess...


One of many new baby dolls...


Billy enjoyed the party, too...


Hubby made THE BEST smoked, pulled pork - YUM...


Singing happy birthday (the candle went out)...


Leila blew anyway... :-)


Cousins...


Yes, Landon was there in his luau attire. Leila enjoyed cupcake #2 (or 3 or 4 or 5)...


Andy & I with our big girl!


As a mom, this was my first time experiencing birthday excitement through my child and I can't wait for future birthdays to come! Living vicariously through them is even better than experiencing the excitement yourself!